


I Don't Think You're Scared of Anything

by FrizzleNox



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: David Rose has been through a lot, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Halloween, Husbands, M/M, Patrick Brewer calms David Rose, fears, truth telling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:01:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27054607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrizzleNox/pseuds/FrizzleNox
Summary: “Why are you so brave?”“I’m really not, I like that you think I’m brave.”David and Patrick grow closer while discussing their fears one stormy fall night.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 7
Kudos: 73
Collections: Schitt's Creek Trick Or Treat





	I Don't Think You're Scared of Anything

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [SCTrickOrTreat](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCTrickOrTreat) collection. 



> **Prompt:**  
>  On a stormy Halloween night, David and Patrick have an unexpected and honest discussion about their greatest fears.

“Looks like we won’t have power until sometime tomorrow,” Patrick sighed. It was his first Halloween at the cottage and the first holiday he and David would be celebrating alone as a married couple. “I just got a text from our neighbors down the road, they said the transformer blew. This storm is unlike anything I’ve seen in a while” He headed into the living room and looked at David who was curled up on the couch near the fireplace. “I know this isn’t what we had planned, but we’ll make it work.” He pressed a kiss to the top of his husband’s head before going to light the fireplace.

Their Halloween night plans had come to a stop when the storm came in and the lights flickered. Their not-so-scary movie marathon was canceled when the power went out. Patrick knew David wasn’t happy. He’d been looking forward to snuggling on the couch, eating candy, and watching movies with Patrick all week. 

Patrick was thankful that he was prepared for any sort of power outage. He’d set up some logs in the fireplace earlier in the week in anticipation of the first cold night when David would request a fire. He was a planner. He liked having things ready before they needed to be. It was how Patrick always had been. 

Once the fire was going, he joined David on the couch, wrapping his arms tightly around his blanket covered husband. David was a creature of habit. He wasn’t a fan of unexpected changes. He’d cocooned himself in his favorite quilt when the power flickered, trying to calm himself while Patrick went to investigate the outage. Patrick held David close, rubbing circles on his back, knowing that it would soothe him.

“Why are you so brave?” David murmured, still hidden under the blanket, leaning into the touches. 

“I’m really not, I like that you think I’m brave,” Patrick admitted, sighing. He knew that David viewed him as his knight in shining armor sometimes. He had a way of calming David, of talking him down and saving him from uncomfortable situations. 

“You are Patrick.” David peeled the blanket down, sticking his head out to look at Patrick. “I like the fire. Thank you.”

Patrick held his arms out, glad when David crawled between his legs, resting his back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around David, holding him close, watching the logs crackle in the fireplace, unsure what to say next.

“I get scared sometimes. I’ve got my fears, David. I guess I’m not as open about them as you are.” He sighed. He knew this was a conversation they’d need to have. Patrick didn’t shut down when faced with his fears the way David did. Instead, he internalized them, hid them away, put on a brave face. 

“What are you scared of? I mean, I don’t think you’re scared of bugs, or the dark, or sex.”

“David. It’s just that I’ve never had to face my fears when I’ve been with you.” Patrick pressed a kiss to the side of David’s head. “That’s why you think I’m so brave.”

“So, are you scared of clowns, witches, sharks?” David thought for a moment. “I know you’re not afraid of heights or the dark.”

“None of those. It’s so stupid, but I don’t like small boats.” Patrick was blushing. He’d never spoken of his fear before. It had been brought on by an incident at summer camp, nearly 20 years ago that had caused the fear.

He felt David shift, looking up at him. “Do you wanna talk about it? Explain it to me?”

“Yeah, I uh, guess I should.” Patrick knew David wouldn’t judge him. They’d only been married eight weeks, but they’d been together for more than two years and spent most days working together. There weren’t a ton of secrets left between them. 

“David, did you ever go to summer camp?” Patrick knew he should know the answer. They’d discussed childhood summers in the past but he’d forgotten. 

“Yeah, I hated it, why?” 

“When I was a kid, I went every summer to a camp up north. I loved it at first. I could spend all day exploring in the woods, playing baseball with the other campers, swimming in the lake. It was relaxing, fun. I could choose to do whatever I wanted to do solo, and I used to go out in a kayak and just paddle on the lake, getting lost in my thoughts, I loved it.” He sighed softly noticing David was fully focused on him. 

“Patrick, what changed?”

“I mean I still love kayaks, just to clarify. My fear started the year I was finally old enough to participate in the camp Olympics. All the campers were split into teams, and whatever team won the most points in different sporting events would be the winner. I was so excited. I love being competitive. Some of my teammates didn’t feel the same way. You remember how stupid some guys started getting when you were 13, right?”

David nodded and laughed. “Yeah, I mean, I may have kissed half my class at that age, trying to figure out what I liked.”

“David!”

“What?”

“You did not.”

“I did. How many times have I told you that I started to doubt my sexuality when I first watched Titanic and didn’t know if I was more interested in Jack or Rose. I explored things at a young age.” David was blushing a little. 

“Okay, well when I was 13, I wasn’t like that. I didn’t have my first kiss until I was 16, but that’s not the point. When I was 13, I was allowed to participate in the camp Olympics. I was so excited. I’d get to learn archery and canoe racing. Unfortunately, my teammates didn’t think like I did. They were hormonal boys, who just wanted to impress the girls. I hated it but I tolerated it since I usually wasn’t involved. The Olympics were going well, and despite the silliness from my teammates, we were doing okay going into the canoe races.” Patrick tensed a bit. He hadn’t told anyone this story before outside of his campmates. 

“Patrick, breathe. I wanna know about what happened.” David tried to soothe him.

“Well, the first few days in the canoe were okay. Some of the guys wanted to splash each other a little and joke around, but I was having fun paddling. I was annoyed but I tolerated it, because I knew they were just being boys. It was all good until after our big race. We won, which was great, but we had drama paddling back to shore. One of the girls, Misty, was very popular amongst my teammates. She was an early bloomer and had a bit of a reputation. Rumor had it that she’d fooled around with most of my teammates, and things came to a head between Mike and Jeff as we rowed back. Misty had come to watch with a sign that read ‘Good Luck Mike!” on it. Jeff had noticed and didn’t like it. They started arguing as we paddled, which ended up with punches being thrown. David, have you ever tried to fight someone in a canoe?”

“Um… no. Why would I?”

“Well they hadn’t either, and their movements caused the boat to rock and eventually tip over. It was awful. I’m a good swimmer but I hated being dunked in the lake.” Patrick sighed. “I thought it was a one-time thing, but it wasn’t. Jeff thought it was funny after the fact, because once we got back in and got to shore, some of the girls surrounded us, wanting to make sure we were okay. He managed to flip our canoe two or three more times that summer for the attention. It was awful. I haven’t been able to get in a small multi-person boat since.” Patrick looked at David. 

“I didn’t ask you if you wanted to go in a canoe that time we went to the lake because I’m still scared of them.” 

“Patrick, I thought you didn’t ask me about a boat rental because you knew I’d say no,” David said honestly. “I was perfectly happy to sit on the dock reading while you went out on your own in the kayak.”

“I’m fine going in small boats on my own. No one but me can tip them.” Patrick bit his lip and looked at David. “Sometimes I’m glad I married a man who isn’t a huge outdoors person. No worry about sharing a canoe with you.” He laughed and was quickly silenced with a kiss from David.

“See, I’m perfect for you.” He teased.

“What are you afraid of, David. I mean besides the things I already know, snakes, bugs, me leaving you.” Patrick ruffled David’s hair. “I hope you’re not scared of that last thing. I’m yours for life. I love you so much.”

“I love you too. I still worry that you’re gonna leave me, I mean I know you won’t. I never thought I’d find someone who loved me as much as you do.” David snuggled tighter against Patrick, taking a moment to figure out how to phrase his fear. “I’m kind of scared of neon colors.”

Patrick pressed a kiss into the top of David’s head. “How so, David? Is that why you don’t wear many colors?”

“Sort of. I mean, it’s much easier just to wear blacks and greys and whites. They all match. You know how I said you wouldn’t have liked me if you met me in high school?” 

“Yeah. You were a raver or something, right?”

“Mmmhm. I wore lots of colors then. Yellows, pinks, greens, blues. All sorts of bright neon colors. It looked like a rainbow puked on my outfit some days. Everything was bright, in your face. Looking back now it looked awful together, but it made me happy, allowed me to stand out.” He paused for a moment to swat at Patrick. “It’s not funny.”

“You just said that you looked like rainbow puke, I can’t not laugh at that.”

David rolled his eyes and continued his story, knowing he’d hear about rainbow puke many more times in the future, it was the kind of thing he’d be shocked if Patrick didn’t tell Stevie. “I looked really good under backlights when I was clubbing or at a rave. I felt happiest then, loved, wanted. Looking back, it wasn’t real love, people just liked me because I had money and could score drugs easily, and I was an easy fuck.” David bit his lip and took a deep breath to stop himself from crying. He’d spent many years trying to forget his teenage years, but his husband had brought it up, and he knew he’d feel better once everything was off his chest. 

“We don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to,” Patrick whispered reassuringly. 

David loved how Patrick didn’t push him, didn’t ask him to elaborate on things. He shook his head. “I need to tell you this. Get it off my chest. It’ll help me, I know it.” He shifted a little, curling up in Patrick’s lap, thankful when Patrick’s arms tightened around him. He felt safe with Patrick.

“I’m listening.”

“I wasn’t a good person then. Looking back, I was never truly happy. I thought I was, but I was just chasing little highs. My weekends were all the same. I’d go to a rave, do some drugs, have some drinks, meet someone, fuck them, and wake up alone, sometimes hungover the next day. I was self-destructive. I was always miserable once my high wore off when I’d see someone I’d hooked up with previously and they’d pretend I didn’t exist. I floated from person to person then. 

Looking back now it was dangerous. I wasn’t that smart. I didn’t know what love was. I never slept with someone more than two or three times before they’d tire of me and ghost me or let me know that they didn’t ‘do monogamy.’ It’s why I didn’t believe you were serious at first when you proposed. I never felt truly loved or wanted before. I never thought it was something I was worthy of.” David knew the tears were coming and he couldn’t stop them, He needed to push on, to finish his confession.

“I got out of the whole rave scene in college. I wanted to try something new, to focus on my studies. I wanted to be taken seriously. I figured if I wanted to have success in the art world, I’d need to look the part. I started wearing all muted tones at first. Nothing bright, no more neons or beads. It made me look a bit older. People started to take me seriously. I liked this new David. I had my first few relationships, second, third, fourth dates. They all ended in less than a month, but they were better than one and done hookups.”

“David, when did you stop wearing colors? I’ve never seen you wear much color other than when you borrow my clothes.”

“Not too long before I moved to Schitt’s Creek. Sebastian Raine broke me. I thought I loved him, that I was in love with him. When I found out he’d been sleeping around the last month of our relationship I was devastated. I was a wreck. I needed a change, so I stopped wearing the colors I associated with him. I wanted to hide after he broke me, and I felt like I could hide if I was just wearing shades of black and white.” David felt wetness on his cheeks. He was crying. It felt good, cathartic. He needed to get it out. He pushed on, knowing he needed to finish his story.

“Bright colors give me anxiety now. They give me flashbacks to who I was, who I used to be. I never want to be that person again. That’s why the store is all in muted tones, why I don’t wear bright colors. I can’t handle it. It brings back so many bad memories.” David snuggled and started to sob. He’d never admitted. His fear of colors to anyone before. “It’s part of what attracted me to you. You weren’t bright, flashy. As much as I tease you about it, I love how you look in blue.”

Patrick had felt David’s body tense and knew that the tears were coming. He could read David. He’d learned what to look for when he’d need to tell David to breathe. He rocked David slowly, gently in his arms, wanting to soothe him. This wasn’t how he’d expected the night to go, but he knew that they’d be closer after their storytelling. 

“David, everything is gonna be okay. I’ve got you.” He whispered, feeling the tears dampening his shirt. He ran a hand up and down David’s back, hoping to distract him, to make him feel better. David hadn’t had a good cry like this since the day after their wedding when they’d made love for the first time as husbands. That night it was all of the emotions that David had been feeling coming to a head. Alexis and his parents’ move, the happiness, and realization that he was a married man, that Patrick had actually married him. He’d never felt so much love in his life, and he’d started sobbing as he rode out his orgasm. 

“Thank you, Patrick.” He murmured, trying to calm himself. 

“Breathe, David. I’m here. No need to be afraid of anything.” 

David started to settle and soon fell asleep, exhausted from all the emotions that had been brought to a head, curled up in Patrick’s arms on the couch.

Patrick watched him sleep before drifting off himself as the fire in the fireplace burned itself out, exhausted itself, just like David had done.

**Author's Note:**

> Chromophobia is the fear of colors.


End file.
